Month: February 2011

I wish i could turn back the time…

A thousand apologize to my Programming lecturer back to my uni year ..Sir, i wish i listen to your lecture and i’m truly sorry because i always skip your class πŸ™

Now i learn my lesson in a very hard way..i can’t even do any simple programming anymore πŸ™

I can’t seem to understand why i can’t pass some parameter to another function. Sir i am that stupid, i admit πŸ™

I always thought i can choose not to do it. But now here i am..Loosing track on which and where, when how and so much more..I wish book can explain, but no one like you sir..no one..:(

Now i really need to read everything from the start πŸ™

There goes your karma

Do you believe in karma?

Some people says worthless people blame karma for everything..I would say some people just don’t want to accept failure or doesn’t want to work hard for whatever they wanted. Karma will be the best thing to be blamed..

I do believe in karma.  Just for a reason to be good to others πŸ™‚

When your life doesn’t fit your dream, think back how awful sometimes you talk bad about others, killing someone with your words. So maybe that’s your karma..

So if we want to be treated nicely in life, get all dreams in your hands, then be good πŸ™‚

Am i optimist enough?

When I decided to move back to my hometown, and close my chapter working in a high corporate world in big city, I had decided to become a very optimist in everything. I need to educate myself to be someone who never wants to take anything personally in life.
Learning stage is very hard. I always have to keep reminding myself to be positive. Later that I found that acting it will be easier. Sort of, I act to be positive to teach me how to be positive..Hmm ya I know confusing..ha ha
But it did come to some points that I really burst into tears, hatred and blaming. I hate everything that happens to me unexpectedly, unplanned.  I want to hate everything and everyone that hurt me, and just forget about being optimist. I a m just a human being with a feeling, not a machine that people can always throw something at me and I still smile. But i overcome it finally.
Building my own business from scratch and alone is not an easy task as I imagine it is. A month with so many rejections, so many failures. But I think the practice i did on trying to be optimist really helpful. People will shut me up before I finish my word, clients will make me wait for hours for an appointments, some will try to take advantages for me being a woman, even some accusing me flirting with their husband- take note that the husband is way too old even to be my father! Urgh, it is not the work loads that killing me, but the stress from the people I deal with.
When all happen, I will tell myself that success is about creating a space for myself, and letting go all unimportant things. Taking time to reboot myself, deleting unwanted files (even empty the recycle bin)..learning more and gaining more experience. 
Motivating myself with success and my target will makes me remember why I start this business. Not for me to brag around, but for my own satisfaction. That I finally know I really can do it by myself.
So yea, me, a woman who still trying to figure out how to survive in a wild world. Learning to be optimist in every single step she takes, and gaining knowledge for every footsteps. 
I am blessed to be someone who still have my girlfriends with me, sharing about life, relationship and learn from each other mistakes. Friends who always be there for each other good or bad times. some people don’t have it, and im truly blessed. Maybe that’s what friends are for..

I might be not optimist enough ..yet..but in a process of learning, i am picking up quite fast πŸ˜›